12 Nov 1976 Pontiac Astre
A lesser version of the not so cool Vega. After the Pinto was destroyed, with the insurance money, my dad found me a car and decided this was the car I was buying. In fact, he bought it without asking me. I HATED this car. I hated everything about this car. As much as I loved the Pinto and it’s FREEDOM, I equally hated this car. It had been owned by an older lady who drove it to church on Sundays. If you know this car, it somehow made the Pinto look even cooler than it was, because this car was so uncool. I used to hide it in the parking lot so people wouldn’t see me in it.
I used to hide it in the parking lot so people wouldn’t see me in it.
About a week after getting the car, and trying to find a way INTO witness protection, my brother and I were out for a drive, and I decided to see what this car could do – ahahahahahahaha.
We took it down the highway one exit to warm it up a bit (not that it really mattered) and as we loop onto the exit, we are going to see what it’s got. Once on the highway, I floored it, pedal right to the floorboard. I was ready to be pinned back in the seat, ready to feel all 78 horsepower (yes, the HP was 78 at 4200 RPM – a burner). It did nothing. It literally made a noise like I do when I sit now that I am older – almost a sigh. Well, after what felt like 3 seconds, it started to pull (I use pull jokingly here) but now here we go. I think we reached 70mph and the car seemed like it was going to fall apart. I didn’t slow down after that; the car was simply maxed – at 70MPH. Now, I hated the car even more BUT that wasn’t the best part of the ride.
I was ready to be pinned back in the seat, ready to feel all 78 horsepower...
I looked in the rear view mirror for cops – all they would’ve done is given me a ticket for being too slow – and its dark. To the point that both of us looked back and said, “it’s not supposed to rain”. It wasn’t the weather! The car had clearly only been driven to church and back (like we were told) because when I stepped on gas, it let out this massive black cloud of carbon. People were literally turning their headlights on and had their wipers on behind us. Well, this is the second most embarrassing thing that has happened to me in a car! Here’s the deal, we can’t outrun anyone. So, we just meandered that one exit as the cars passed us and gave us annoyed looks. I think I saw a few “oh I am sorry for you” looks but I don’t remember. I just remember the day we made Rte 495 North from Berlin to Bolton dark!
This car came to an end one night after work – I worked the closing shift as I heard a SNAP and suddenly, the car made a hard left. Something had broken in the front end, and I had zero control. Thankfully, the car chose the opening to the Post Office to go left into because I had really no choice.